Viral Happiness

Change.

We seem to be geared to resist it. We seem to be inclined to walk in place so long that our track becomes a rut. And our rut becomes a trap.

We claim to want to be calmer and more at peace, but we fall into those same old frustrations. We claim to want to do the things that we wish to do, but we don’t do them. We claim to want a direction change, and then we continue walking in the same old, tired direction.

And then often, after encountering frustration upon frustration, we give up. We throw in the towel. We quit. And to soothe ourselves, we make excuses. And, for those of us who have reached a certain age, the classic excuse is: “I guess it’s just too late for me. I’m too set in my ways. I cannot change.”

I just reread what I’ve written to this point, and, if I was inclined to get depressed, I would be. Has it been painful to read? It was painful to write, I can assure you.

It’s easy to get caught in a downward spiral. It’s easy to believe that the chance for change has passed you by. It’s easy to read guru after guru whose lives have been transformed and to wonder why you can’t transform your own life.

But if my 28 day transformation experiment has taught me anything, it’s that transformation is simple. To be honest, it’s not easy, as we define easy. It takes effort because you have to think, and thinking is the hardest work you’ll ever do. But it is simple.

Let me repeat that: ‘changing your life is simple.’

Today, while going through some papers, I found something I had written during my 28 day experiment. And it synchronistically complements the key to simple change. Here’s the quote:

“If you fear that you have wasted your life up until this point, then stop wasting it right now.”

Do you ever have the feeling that your life has been wasted? Do you ever feel that you have squandered your potential? Do you feel that your opportunity to make your mark on life has passed you by? Then NOW is the time to do things differently. Not tomorrow, not next week, but NOW.

Nothing is done ‘tomorrow.’ The only time to do anything is now. Action takes place now, and there’s never any type of change without action. So, if you feel that you have not done what you are capable of doing, begin doing it NOW!

During my 28 day transformation experiment (and beyond), I have been reading and studying voraciously. (I’ll share more about that in a subsequent post.) Last night I was reviewing some information from Wayne Dyer’s book, ‘The Power of Intention.” Here’s a quote that reveals the key to positive change.

“Act as if your desire is already here…treat yourself as if you already are what you’d like to become.”

Did you get that? Think about it this way, what kind of person do you need to be to accomplish what you’d like to accomplish? Do you need to be a person who is not addicted to TV, anger, and procrastination? Then give those things up. Do you need to be someone who is mindful, thoughtful, and meditative? Then take on those qualities immediately.

In a previous post, I have mentioned a good and wise friend of mine named Mr. 20/20. This is a man who is so dedicated to the importance of getting a ‘vision’ in his own life and helping others get their ‘vision,’ he legally changed his name to Mr. 20/20. He is also one of the most brilliant, loving, and open people I’ve ever met, and, one night on a conference call,  he spoke one phrase that totally captures the art of positive change.

During our conversation, I mentioned something I was trying to accomplish, and he offered the following insight:

“Buz, be your emerging self.”

That one phrase has helped me in countless situations, and that simple philosophy is key to my transformation and to your transformation. Whenever you are faced with a challenge or a decision of any kind, be your emerging self. Decide what the ‘dream you’ would do and do that. Don’t act like the person you’d like to change; act like the person you want to be.

Do you want to be a more positive person? Then act like a more positive person.

Do you want to be a more loving person? Then act like a more loving person.

Do you want to be wiser, happier, and calmer? Then act like a wiser, happier, and calmer person.

That’s how you become who you want to be.

And it’s never too late to change. It’s never too late to make decisions that will take you where you want to go. It’s never too late to make the choices that will transfrom you into the person you long to be. But you must start now. This very minute. Immediately begin making decisions like the person you want to be.

Are you resisting the possibility that you can change? Then this is your first practice. Decide if the ‘emerging you’ would resist or accept positive change, and then be that emerging you. I think the ‘you’ that you want to be would welcome and embrace positive change.

It really is that simple, and it’s never too late to begin.

The old year is gone. The New Year is now upon us.

What plans did you make at the beginning of 2008 that didn’t work out for you? What would you like to do in 2009?

We all make plans. We all have wishes, dreams, and desires, and the New Year tends to bring these wishes, dreams, and desires to the forefront of our thinking. Now is the time to do everything you can to pave the way for a better year. Now is the time to discover what has been stopping you from reaching those heights you know you should reach.

So, what’s stopping you?

I believe that the only thing that can keep you from achieving your dreams is………..

You.

That’s right. You are the culprit. You are the reason that you are not where you want to be. And I’m not saying this as a way of blaming or chastising. I’m preaching the exact same sermon to myself as I preach it to you.

I am the only person that can stop me from reaching my goals, from realizing the fulfillment of my desires. It’s me.

We may couch it in other terms. We may want to say that it’s because of our crappy jobs or the stock market or the government or a spouse or our negative upbringing or a million other superficial things that are easy to point to and blame.  But, none of that matters.

Once you cut away all the layers of excuse, we are at the core of our imagined reasons.

Now I understand that you may not be able to do everything you’d like to do immediately to change your life. But, you can do something everyday. You can decide where you’d like to be and begin taking steps in that direction.

I’ve been working on creating a system for transforming a life in 28 days, and I’ve pulled 10 specific directives for transformation out of that research and experimentation. One of these directives fits well with what I’m writing today. And that is…

Act now.

Now is the only time we have. It’s where all worthwhile action takes place. We can dream about the future and learn from the past, but the only time to act is now.

So, chart your course and act now. You don’t have to take giant steps. Just do those things everyday that take you in your desired direction.

Begin by taking ownership of your life. Accept the fact that you are the only person who ultimately gets in your way. Even if it seems that, for example, “I can’t enjoy a moment of quiet contemplation daily because my family won’t understand,” it’s not your family or anyone else that’s stopping you. It’s your concerns about how your family or boss or friends will react that’s stopping you, and that decision is your own.

There’s a Donovan song that’s a favorite of mine called “New Year’s Resovolution.” I’ve been listening to it a lot lately. Allow me to share some of the lyrics with you.

“So many times, I was the one who stopped myself from doing things.
So many times, I was the one who grounded myself and clipped my wings.”

Don’t ground yourself. Don’t clip your wings. In this ‘mystery’ of why we aren’t where we want to be, we are the culprit. We are the thief of our dreams.

It’s time to get out of your own way and soar.