Viral Happiness

(Please note:  this blog post is a continuation of my previous post, and this one will lead to another. If you haven’t read the past couple of posts, it might help to go back and read them. You can get good information from this post without doing so, but it will help you to know where I’ve come from and how I turned things around.)

Who are you?

We are so often stumped by that puzzling question. I know it stumped me, and I didn’t even realize that it WAS stumping me. I didn’t realize that I didn’t know who I really was.

So,  ask yourself…

Who is the REAL you?

In my last blog post, I told you that I changed my life by changing my thinking, and that is absolutely true. But, without delving a bit deeper, we just might miss the beginning point. We just might miss the true ground zero for change. We just might miss the center that creates the life changing thoughts.

And, to show you how to change your life at the speed of thought, we need to explore the very important question that begins this blog post.

Who are you?

Sadly enough, many never grasp the answer to this question. For many, it just seems so darned elusive.

But it’s not elusive when you know where to look.

And the place you look is in your heart.

Search your heart and tell me who you long to be. Search your dreams, your desires, your wishes. Who are you in your perfect daydream? Who are you in your secret, longing heart?

Here is the trick, but please read carefully, because it seems so simple; and I don’t want you to miss it.

Who you long to be is who you really are.

Stay with me for a minute; this concept may take just a moment to make sense.

Who you really want to be…that ‘fantasy you’ of your wildest dreams…that is who you really are.

During my mid-life crisis, I was indecisive…hesitant…worried, and I thought that was who I had become. I was not expecting the best. I had accepted a struggling lifestyle, and I was expecting hardship after hardship. But one day I realized that the way I was acting was not the real me. The real me was who I was in my dreams, that person who I aspired to be.

Does that make sense?

You are not some weak person struggling through life. That is not the real you. The you that you want to change is the you that years of improper instruction and erroneous influence has helped create. But that is NOT the person that you were born to be. That’s not who you really are.

You are longing to become something that you already are.

So the first step is to determine who you really are. I would suggest that you write a detailed description of the you that you long to be. Give specific details about your wishes and desires, what you long to do and where you’d love to live and what your life’s work should be. Detail desired  specifics about your relationships and list the qualities that  make up your dream personality.

Take a long look at the person you have described because that is the REAL you.

Once you determine who you really are, make decisions, take actions, and, most importantly, think thoughts consistent with that person.

That is where the change in thinking takes place. It begins with a change in being.

Just be who you really are.

(In my next post, the saga continues.)

It’s funny what gets to you sometimes.

I had just moved my family into a smaller home. My son’s girlfriend was visiting, and we were going to sit and watch TV. I had sold our sofa and could not afford to replace it. I had a couple of matching old armless easy chairs pushed together so it would seem kind of like  a sofa. There was one more (very uncomfortable) chair in the room. When we gathered in the den and she innocently asked, “Where do we all sit?” – I felt an empty pit in my stomach.

We didn’t have enough places to sit because I was a failure.

That was a few years ago, but it still hurts to remember.

—————–

I’ve been putting off publishing this post.

I’ve written and rewritten it for three weeks, wondering exactly what to share with you.

Recalling this part of my story is difficult. But it’s an important part of my personal development, and, if you ever have to deal with some of these same issues,  this information may help.

So, even though I’m somewhat  hesitant to spill my guts, here goes…

Approximately six years ago, I had what I now lovingly call my mid-life crisis.

And, as I consider it now, I find that this ‘crisis’ boils down to two issues… actually these issues are opposite sides of the same coin: abundance and lack.

And it’s not just about money. This is much more involved than money…even though money plays a part.

But it is definitely about more than just my economic condition because I’ve learned that our perspective of either abundance or lack  colors everything in our experience. Every challenge is an exercise in what we seem to lack.

My mid-life challenge was no different.

This type of challenge can be sneaky, because, even as the crisis was occurring, I was fervently studying self development. So, if you are pursuing your own self development, and if you continue to be confronted by difficult challenges, trust me,  you are not alone.

I had to downsize a retail business that had grown steadily for years. I had assumed that it would continue to grow and expand, but it began to slow and contract. This was not only devastating to my bottom line; it was also devastating to my sense of self-worth.

At the risk of sounding sexist, men are often judged by how well they provide for their families, and my provision began to falter.

As I was being forced to downsize my business, I also sold our family  home of 15 years and moved to a smaller house. The economic pressure was substantial, and I was navigating foreign waters.

I had to borrow money. I had to confront difficult situations. I had to continue going through the motions.

During that time, it seemed that my days consisted of shifting from crisis to crisis, and, for a while, there was very little relief. There never seemed to be enough…enough money, enough opportunity, enough time.

I felt stuck.

And that’s where the true sense of lack occurs. When you feel as though you face a dearth of choices – when you decide that you simply have no choice, that’s when you find yourself drowning in a deep perspective of lack. It’s acutely painful.

Have you ever felt trapped like that?

Have you ever felt like there is no good choice available to you?

Have you ever felt defeated?

If you have, you’ve come to the right place, because that is exactly how I felt.

I simply did not know what to do next. And that. for me, was the crux of the crisis.

But one day, everything changed.

It changed because I finally remembered a simple technique that I had used in the past when I faced other challenges. It’s the same technique I used when my doctor suggested that I might be suffering from depression (I relate that story fully in Mastering Your Power of Release).

It’s the ONLY tool I know of that works every time, and I’m not  sure why I allowed myself to get to a very low point before I used it in this situation. Maybe I had not thought about using it during my crisis because it just seems so darned simple. And when I share it with you now, you may be tempted to say, “Wait a minute…that’s it?”

But I promise, if you will master this technique, you will be on your way to conquering any challenge quickly and easily.

I simply changed my thinking.

That’s the most concise way of putting it. I  changed my thoughts. I refused to entertain any thoughts of defeat. I began thinking winning thoughts. I recaptured success in my mind.

And it worked.

I believe that’s enough to share at this time. This may not seem like a big deal to you, but admitting my shortcomings in such a public forum has not been easy for me. I’m a private person, and I share this part of my story now in hopes that something I say may be of help to you.

In my next blog entry, which will be posted much quicker than this one was, I will tell you exactly how I did it, and exactly how that change in my thinking eventually led to my thinking sabbatical and to my 28 day transformation experiment and how this  all ties in to my recent election victory and my business turnaround.

That’s a lot to relate, and it may take a couple of posts to get it all in. But this is good stuff. And, if you need some success suggestions in your own life, this may help you.

And, hey, it’s free information. All you have to do is come by and read it and see if it somehow relates to your own experience.

If it does relate, great! If it doesn’t relate, all it’s cost you is a little time.

I’ll offer my next entry very soon.

I have a natural inclination to downplay my own success. It’s a trait leftover from my childhood, when I was taught not to brag. So, I tend to soften my successes.

But that won’t do you any good.

You need to know about my success. You need to know how I achieve it. You need to find the success clues and apply them in your own situation.

The time for downplaying success is over, because, if I am not successful, you need to move on and read someone else. If I haven’t figured out some basic principles for my own life, you don’t need my influence and teaching. If I am not willing to  stand up and say, “I’m more than just a nice guy; I’ve figured out some things that can help you live better,” then I’m not really worth your time. That’s simply the way it is.

You and I are not here to brag, that’s true. But we are here to learn, improve, and accomplish. Because, we can learn plenty of theory, but if the learning doesn’t lead to accomplishment, what good is that knowledge?

Consider these questions:

Why are you reading this blog?

Why do you read other blogs, articles and books?

What do you want to do with this information?

Even though we pursue information, we are not really after information as an end. We are after a better life. We are longing for more love, more money, more freedom, more fulfillment. We are longing for that elusive something that makes us say, “Ahhhh, here it is at last! Now, I have arrived!”

We are looking for  SUCCESS.

We long to live a successful life.

And that’s what I intend to discuss in my next few blog posts.

As we discuss success, please keep these three truths in mind:
1. SUCCESS leaves clues.
2. SUCCESS can be recreated.
3. SUCCESS occurs one success at a time.

If you think you’ve heard this all before…if you think you know what I’m going to share…you may be right. But you need to ask yourself one very important question: “Am I on a path to success?”

If you’re not, then pay attention. You either need knowledge, application, or action. And, over my next few blog posts, I intend to discuss all three.

But be forewarned -  the key is action!

And I’m not talking about taking action by buying something from me. I haven’t refined this information into a product yet. I’m not trying to sell you anything.

If you read these posts, you’ll be getting the real, raw, off-the-cuff deal. I’m teaching on the fly, strictly by the seat of my pants.

But the key for you is the willingness to take fearless action.

You’ve got to be willing to get up and do something. If you’re not willing, stop right now. Don’t read any further. You are wasting your time.

That may sound a little harsh coming from me. If you’ve read much of my teaching, you know that I am very open and loving. Love is the reason I do what I do.

But it’s time for a little tough love. If I really love you (which I do), I can’t be satisfied if you are living beneath your potential. It’s like the message of my favorite Mary Chapin Carpenter song,

“Why Walk When You Can Fly?”

Click on that link and listen to the words. Resolve that you are ready to fly. Refuse to  settle for less.

And be on the lookout for my next post.

You may know that I’m running for a position on the local governing board of my town. That’s why my blog posts have been scarce lately. Campaigning is time consuming work.

Part of my political approach involves knocking on every door in town, and, even though I live in a small town, that’s still a lot of people for one man to visit.

The experience has been amazing.

I’ve always had a heart for the well-being of others,  but this experience has increased those feelings.

In the past, I’ve wondered exactly what I could do to improve things in my community, and this experience has helped me discover real  needs community-wide.

It’s also helped me to discover the heart of this community. It has been my belief that most of the people in my small town are open and friendly and warm, and this experience has shown me that they are even more open and friendlier than I had ever imagined.

When this campaign is over, win or lose, I have received life lessons that have made the hard work worthwhile. It has been amazing.

As you go about your day, consider all of the people that you meet along your way. Take the time to say a prayer for them or to send them positive thoughts and energy. If you are open to the experience, smile as you pass…say hello…engage them in conversation.

There are opportunities for life lessons in each serendipitous connection.  If you pay attention and remain open, you will be amazed at what you can learn from each person you meet.

What are you waiting for?

What do you expect to happen that will suddenly propel you to where you want to be?

Are you waiting for the stars to align? Are you waiting for magic beans to sprout? Are you waiting for some final piece of the cosmic puzzle to fall in to place?

Transformation is real. Positive change is real. You are the transformation. You are the only source of positive change in your life. And it’s not going to happen by accident. You will not just stumble into the life you want. You must take it.

What do you want to do? Whatever it is, there are other people who are doing it right now. And they are no smarter than you. They are no more deserving than you. They are simply doing something besides talking and wishing.

Are you afraid that you might try and fail?

You can come up with a million reasons why you shouldn’t or you can’t. But why not come up with one good reason to do what you want to do. Why not see the possibilities instead of the problems. Change your perspective and change your world.

The people you see who are doing the things you wish to do are no different than you are. They aren’t any smarter. They aren’t more capable.  They are just willing to do something. They are willing to step out.

What has your current set of beliefs accomplished for you up to this point in your life? If life is working for you, keep doing that. If life is not working for you, it’s time to change.

There’s no mystery. There’s no secret. And, at this point, I’m not trying to sell you a thing.

Once I finish collating my information that has come out of my 28 day transformation, I’ll have a new package to sell, and it will be worthwhile, I assure you.  But that’s coming later. This is simply my word to you this evening.

Make tomorrow different.

Quit wasting your time doing all sorts of junk that has nothing to do with you leading the kind of life that you choose.

Your time is precious. Each moment is like gold…once you spend it, it’s gone. So please make it count.

Don’t allow yourself any more excuses. Design the life you want to live and live it.

Start right now.

The old year is gone. The New Year is now upon us.

What plans did you make at the beginning of 2008 that didn’t work out for you? What would you like to do in 2009?

We all make plans. We all have wishes, dreams, and desires, and the New Year tends to bring these wishes, dreams, and desires to the forefront of our thinking. Now is the time to do everything you can to pave the way for a better year. Now is the time to discover what has been stopping you from reaching those heights you know you should reach.

So, what’s stopping you?

I believe that the only thing that can keep you from achieving your dreams is………..

You.

That’s right. You are the culprit. You are the reason that you are not where you want to be. And I’m not saying this as a way of blaming or chastising. I’m preaching the exact same sermon to myself as I preach it to you.

I am the only person that can stop me from reaching my goals, from realizing the fulfillment of my desires. It’s me.

We may couch it in other terms. We may want to say that it’s because of our crappy jobs or the stock market or the government or a spouse or our negative upbringing or a million other superficial things that are easy to point to and blame.  But, none of that matters.

Once you cut away all the layers of excuse, we are at the core of our imagined reasons.

Now I understand that you may not be able to do everything you’d like to do immediately to change your life. But, you can do something everyday. You can decide where you’d like to be and begin taking steps in that direction.

I’ve been working on creating a system for transforming a life in 28 days, and I’ve pulled 10 specific directives for transformation out of that research and experimentation. One of these directives fits well with what I’m writing today. And that is…

Act now.

Now is the only time we have. It’s where all worthwhile action takes place. We can dream about the future and learn from the past, but the only time to act is now.

So, chart your course and act now. You don’t have to take giant steps. Just do those things everyday that take you in your desired direction.

Begin by taking ownership of your life. Accept the fact that you are the only person who ultimately gets in your way. Even if it seems that, for example, “I can’t enjoy a moment of quiet contemplation daily because my family won’t understand,” it’s not your family or anyone else that’s stopping you. It’s your concerns about how your family or boss or friends will react that’s stopping you, and that decision is your own.

There’s a Donovan song that’s a favorite of mine called “New Year’s Resovolution.” I’ve been listening to it a lot lately. Allow me to share some of the lyrics with you.

“So many times, I was the one who stopped myself from doing things.
So many times, I was the one who grounded myself and clipped my wings.”

Don’t ground yourself. Don’t clip your wings. In this ‘mystery’ of why we aren’t where we want to be, we are the culprit. We are the thief of our dreams.

It’s time to get out of your own way and soar.

I believe in going with the flow.

When you go with the flow, you float effortlessly down life’s stream. When you fight the flow, it’s like struggling to swim upstream. So I decided a long time ago to try and not fight the flow. I always intend to just go with it.

Recently, I’ve been working hard on developing a teleseminar; actually, I’ve been planning to develop a series of teleseminars. And that work has been going fine, but, like I said in the previous sentence, I’ve been working “hard.” And if you are going with the flow, things should never be “hard.”

So when inspiration hit me a week or so ago, I gladly succumbed to its influence, because inspiration is never hard. Inspiration is fun and challenging and, yes, it puts you right in the flow. Inspiration occurs when your thinking and feeling and intending all come together in a glorious doing. And who could ever say no to that?

I said yes. And that decision has led to a 28 day experiment. I’m calling it my “Transformational Sabbatical.” I’m taking a sabbatical from the way I’ve been doing things (the hard way), and I’m designing a program that will transform specific areas of my life in easily measured ways; and this transformation will happen in 28 days.

For those who  have purchased ‘Mastering Your Power of Release,’ you already know that I’ve developed extremely effective methods for achieving happiness and success by releasing the baggage that holds you back. And I’m definitely using some of the same methods during my new 28 day experiment.

And I’ve been studying dynamic insights form some of the best transformational minds teaching today and from some of the great old classics. I’ve also been doing a lot of thinking; I mean really taking specific moments to just sit and think. And I’m integrating the best of what I’m learning into my 28 day transformation.

So far, it’s been a blast!

I’ll definitely have a lot to report when I’m done. I’ve set very specific goals, and I’m interested to see how this all works. My intention is that I will create a series of easily followed suggestions that will transform any life in 28 days.

I plan to offer updates as I go. And when I’m through with the 28 days, I’ll review all of the information. And I’ll ask for feedback as I tweak the process.

But, for now, the most exciting thing is that I’m working with my inspiration, and I’m going with the flow. And that approach always makes life more effortless, dynamic, and fun.

Why do we find it so hard to trust?

Recently, I sent an email offering assistance with anything that might be a problem or issue for my readers. I genuinely wanted to know what they were facing. I wanted to know what I could do to help them.

There were no strings attached, and I tried to make this fact very clear. I wasn’t selling anything; I just wanted to help.

Before I sent the email, I wondered how many of my subscribers would take me up on the offer. It occurred to me that some people would just automatically ignore my email. I’ve found that lots of people sign-up for email updates and then ignore them.

But now I’m wondering how many people chose to ignore it because they were skeptical about my sincerity.

One of the people who did respond told me honestly that their first reaction was to wonder, “What does he want from me?” In other words, what’s his angle?

At first, that reaction surprised me. At least, it surprised me until I mulled it over for a little while. And as I sat and pondered, this thought popped into my mind: if one of my ‘gurus’ had sent an email with the same offer, I might have had the same skeptical reaction.

And I really can’t explain why.

I’m associated with lots of honest, helpful, and sincere people. As a matter of fact, I’d say that the vast majority of the teachers and experts I know put service first. So why am I skeptical?

More importantly, what breakthroughs might I miss because of my skepticism? That, my friend, is a valid question.

There are people on my list who missed out on some free help because they were skeptical of my offer. Now I’m forced to wonder what help I may miss out on because of my own skepticism. That is a GREAT and unexpected lesson. One that I intend to take to heart.

So, what do you think? I really want to know.

What makes us so skeptical?

Okay.

The election is over, so everyone just take a minute to breathe. What are your hopes after this historic outcome?

My hope is that the personal acrimony I’ve seen from both sides will stop. Right now. I’ve never seen a more polarizing election.

I’ve heard friends who were against Obama spout some of the most outlandish ‘facts’ that I’ve ever heard. I’ve heard friends who were against McCain say some of the most hate-filled things I’ve ever heard. These are just men, that’s all – flesh and blood like me and you.

Some of Mr. Obama’s support has taken on an almost religious, cult-like attitude. Now that he has won, we will NOT see the dawning of the Age of Aquarius.

By the same token, much of his opposition has also attacked him with religious fervor. I assure you that we have not just elected the anti-Christ.

Both sides have been deifying and demonizing the other side. And that has got to stop.

This is a good lesson for all to remember. The people who govern us are just people. They are not larger than life. They do not possess super-human qualities. They are just people, like you and me.

They have highs and lows. They have certainties and insecurities. They have successes and failures. They are human, not demons and not divine.

They want to make a good living and have friends and be loved and enjoy fuilfilling work and make a difference. And that’s exactly what I want to do. I would guess that’s what you want to do, too.

So, if you are tempted to think (after this election) that all of our worries are over or that the worst thing in the world has just happened, let me assure you that neither is true.

You need to simply keep on working on you and trust that God and this Universe are loving and friendly toward your personal development.

No matter where you stood in this election, just get on with your own personal development and know that expanding your development is the BEST way to assure that everything is going to be alright.

“I just can’t trust these gurus!”

Have you ever thought that?

Or maybe you’ve thought something like this…

“These ‘gurus’ only want one thing, and that’s abundance
at my expense.”

Admit it, this thought has crossed your mind before,
hasn’t it?

If that’s really what you think, maybe that one thought
is keeping you stuck right where you are.

I get emails from many of the same gurus that you do. Some
are good; some are great; some are so-so.

But I celebrate them all!

Would you like to know why?

It’s because they are doing SOMETHING!

They are pursuing their passion as they see fit, and they
are unashamedly putting that passion out there.

Some of these gurus resonate with me, and some don’t.

Some of these same gurus may resonate with you and others won’t.

That’s okay.

But if you find yourself ridiculing them or complaining
about them, I suggest that you stop it right now.

When you employ that kind of negative energy, you hurt
yourself. And you just may stay stuck right where you are.

And being “stuck” is deadly.

It kills your drive and it kills your confidence.

I know because I’ve been there. I’ve been stuck before,
and I know that it’s a deadly place to be.

It’s why I’m serious about teaching you to master your
power of release.

It’s why I’m willing to tell you that your attitude about
others may be part of what’s keeping you stuck.

If you’re getting emails from someone you don’t like
or respect (even if it’s me), you need to get off of
that person’s list. But WHATEVER you do, don’t make
fun of them, don’t complain about them, don’t even
think poorly of them.

The ancient philosopher Seneca said: “Admire those
who attempt great things, even if they fail.”

When these writers and speakers and coaches offer their
instruction and inspiration, they are attempting great
things. And you should celebrate that fact, even if you
feel that they have failed you in some way.

Even if you feel that all they care about is their
abundance at your expense.

So, if you have allowed yourself to slip into cynicism
and negativity about any of these gurus, just remember
that negativity breeds negativity.

And you can never reach a positive outcome when
employing a negative outlook.

So resolve right now to celebrate the passion and drive
and effort of those writers and speakers and coaches who
offer to connect with you.

When they reach out to you they really are attempting
great things.

Thanks for reading!